Like Water for Chocolate

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I am still waiting for the girls to show up.

I pull the last of the treats out of the oven and set them on the table to cool. I've been cooking like a poor man's Jamie Oliver.

                                    

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 I have made, all by me-self: quesadillas, avocado soup, salsa and tamales. I can not cook like Tita from this week's novel, but after reading a book like this, it's an absolute must that we eat Mexican food.

 Or as close to it as we can. 

I cannot find the chiles recommended for each recipe (or bring myself to split quail from rump to whatever that other part is called). 

 Rachel and Frannie arrive at the same time, the former begging for wine straight off. 

 "Rough day, Rach?" I ask. 

 "Rough ride." Rachel answers, reaching for the wine glass and swallowing a gulp. "Frannie just took me for a spin on her scooter." 

 "Call her Gladys. I named my scooter after Flavia de Luce's bicycle, remember? Anyway," Frannie reaches for the bottle and pours a glass for herself, "you asked for the ride of your life and I gave you one." 

"Something has to recover my nerves," Rachel is already finished her first glass of wine and is pouring another."Ohhhh, what is this, Ella?" 

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 I blush a tomato red. "In honor of the book Frannie brought us back from Mexico, I made some Mexican treats. Nothing like Tita's cooking, unfortunately. Still, I thought we could indulge a bit." 

 "It won't make us throw up like the wedding cake in the book, will it?" Frannie asks, picking up Mr. Tumnus and settling him on her lap. 

 "No. And it won't make you alive with passion like Gertrudis, either." 

 "Pity," says Frannie as she swallows her wine and pooches out her lip in a pout. She sighs, then starts the book discussion.  "'right then, do you know what I liked about this book?" 

 "That you were able to watch the movie version on youtube?" I offer. 

 "No, not that. There are only clips on youtube, and they always end just when I was getting interested." Frannie shifts in her seat. "What I liked about this book was that the chapters didn't end with fanfare and cliffhangers. They did slightly, but the big events or the real shockers came in the middle of the paragraph. Just when you thought she was going to take a chicken out of the oven, someone would die and then we'd hear about walnuts and how to crush them. Very interesting how the author did that." 

 Rachel nods her head with wine-induced fervor. "The best bit for me was the whole magic-fantasy parts. You know, people crying rivers, actual rivers of tears. I love when an author gets it right. And this tale was so magical and unique. A great blend of fantasy and food." 

 "I didn't like the ending. Tita chose wrong." Mr. Tumnus meows his disapproval at me, but I stand my ground. "Listen, I know that it was realistic...as realistic as a magic-fantasy book that has buildings burn down from one's own fiery thoughts...but I didn't like it. The ending for me was all wrong." 

 Frannie is too busy eating a tamale to respond. 

Rachel regards me carefully over her wine. "I think you like to play things safe, Ella. That's why you didn't like the ending." 

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 "I do not play things safe," I declare. "Look, this avocado soup has habanero peppers in it. This is utterly screams 'risk taker'." 

 Frannie shakes a finger at me. "Rachel is right, Ella dear. You play it safe. Tita can teach you a thing or two about patience and yearning for love." 

 I look to Mr. Tumnus for help, but he's eating a tortilla off of Frannie's plate. 

I disagree. "I think Tita should have risked it all to have happiness and learn about love. Anyone can burn with passion for years on end. Anyone can treasure a memory and hold it close so that it becomes more dear than any reality. No, real living is in risking to love again, even if it doesn't approach you in the way you expect." 

 "Point taken," Frannie says. "But where would Richard Armitage's Guy of Gisborne be if he adopted that attitude in BBC's Robin Hood Season Two?" 

 "Married." Rachel and I say at the same time. 

 Even Mr. Tumnus stops eating and gives Frannie a flick of his tail. 

 "Oh, right." Frannie nods. "Yes. He should have given up Marian and pursued someone else. Poor Richard Armitage. Always losing the woman he loves. It's like Spooks season Nine all over again." 

"Frannie, stay on topic. Richard Armitage has nothing to do with Like Water for Chocolate. Neither does your obsession with Spooks. It was two years ago." 

 "Is that all? Seems like yesterday..." Frannie looks at her food with great sadness. 

 Rachel drains the remains of her glass. "I loved it. The book is a sensation and a hit from days past and it's obvious why that is. It's smart, deliciously written and full of the zestiness I suspect Mexicans have in their veins." 

 "Yes," Frannie nods as she recollects her last week's jaunt to Mexico. "Cinco certainly had...zest." 

Oh, gag me. I barely cover a sound of disgust. My octogenarian friend is clearly suffering from a case of Living In La-de-de-da Land. 

 Frannie pins me with a look. "Rachel's right, Ella. You play it safe." 

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 "I do not," I defend. Mr. Tumnus just looks away from me as though I am rather pathetic. Am I?

"Right, then, Miss Daring. We'll see what kind of risk taker you, in fact, are." Frannie exchanges a look with Rachel. I can't help but feel that I've been set up by these two schemers. 

 "What now?" I ask. 

 "You'll see. Next week's book comes with it's own risk." 

 "But we're reading the next Alan Bradley book in the Flavia series." I simply do not like Frannie's tone at all. 

I am the picker of the books. Of course, I'll make allowances now and then, like I did this week. If Frannie thinks she can come in here and upend things then I've got a good mind to say "shove off" to her and her Mexican fantasies.

 Rachel chuckles into her glass. "Oh, we'll read Alan Bradley. But...." 

 "But expect something unusual to follow." 

 I reach over and pour wine into my glass. 

If life was anything like this week's novel then the wine would keep pouring, fill up my apartment and float those two ninnies I call my bookmates out the door and down the hallway. 

 This week's book is a Delicious Read that Will Add Calories to Your Bottom Just Reading It.

The Pearl by John Steinbeck

"Rachel, what are you doing?"

Rachel is setting up her laptop and using her mobile to pick up a signal, but I can't seem to make head or tails of it  at all.

"Ella, we are setting up Skype. Frannie can't make it and she says that we are to Skype her to talk about tonight's novel."

My cat, Mr. Tumnus, looks at me with a knowing look. He's suspicious and so am I.
 "Rachel, if we let Frannie Skype us this week, she will want to Skype the week after that and so on. She needs to get out of the house at her age. Besides, who is going to eat all this leftover food. I am already starting to look like Bridget Jones with all the food I'm wolfing down."

Rachel looks up briefly, "Relax, darling. We loved Bridget's wobbly bits and we love yours. Now, tell me what we are eating tonight."

"Oysters, of course," I say, presenting the tray I have put together.

"Ella! Nice touch with the pearls around the edge of the tray. Frannie is going to be sorry she missed this."

The computer speakers squawk to life. "Missing what? What are you girls doing without me?"

"Hello, Frannie," Rachel says. "You are missing out on oysters tonight. Aren't you jealous?"

"Hardly," Frannie sniffs. "I'm in Mexico at a four star resort. You haven't had oysters until a man named Cinco serves you oysters."

Rachel and I exchange a shocked look. I have a thousand questions for Frannie, but if I ask her what she's doing down there, she'll be talking for an hour. Best to get the show on the road, as they say.

"Did you read The Pearl on the plane ride, Frannie?" I ask. I rise to get Rachel her usual glass of wine.

"Indeed. It was excellent. But it's Steinback, Ella. Of course, it's excellent."

"So are these oysters," Rachel says, slurping one back. "All right, first off, I have to say that I love Steinbeck's descriptive writing. It's tight and accurate, yet ripe. I love how he has people being belched out of buildings and the sea and the sky acting like characters."

"Agreed," I say. I scowl at Mr. Tumnus who is licking his lips and staring at the oysters. Moving the tray, I add, "I loved how everything revolved around the music that Kino hears in his head and in his heart. It was a brilliant device used to set the mood in each scene or to transition into an opposing theme. Very clever."

"I love a book that makes you ask questions of yourself. And this book did that. " Frannie nods her head while saying it. "I found myself completely sympathetic to Juana and Kino and their struggle for wanting more in life. I also identified with being caught in that precarious place where things have changed and one can't go back to business as usual. It is an excellent read, Ella. Well done. Good form on this choice, I must say."

I smile and ask Frannie if she has any ideas about what to read next week.

Frannie smiles and gives us a wink. "I'm going to bring you back a little something from Mexico."

Rachel raises her glass in a mock toast and says, "I hope it's a book and not a man named Cinco."

Mr. Tumnus rolls onto his back and I slurp another oyster.

"Oh, it will be good, ladies. Wait and see."

Save As Draft by Cavanaugh Lee

"I thought we were reading a classic this week?" Rachel whines, as she sips on her glass of Pinot Noir.

"Sabotage!" I say. "The librarian said that I absolutely had to read this fun book. And therefore, you did too."

"I was quite looking forward to a musty old read." Frannie says, " But please, not Tess of D'Urbervilles. I just watched the film on youtube and I want my two hours back. I was ready to shave my head and pluck out my eyes by the time the bloody thing ended. Classic or not, Thomas Hardy has wasted my time. And at my age, I don't have that much time left."

"But it was only a film, Frannie. It wasn't the book. The book is always better than the film." I try to calm her down but I fall short.

"I've lived through it once, Ella. I would rather face the heartache of season nine of Spooks ten times over than live through Tess and Angel's story any more. Give me Richard Armitage betraying everyone, including me, any day over that."

"Don't get your knickers in a knot, Frannie." I send my cat, Mr. Tumnus, over to Frannie's chair. Mr. Tumnus is able to be a soothing presence like no other.

Rachel saves the day by starting off the book discussion. "This was a stretch for me, girls. At first, when I saw the format--email drafts, telephone texts, online dating surveys, etc.--I put the book down and planned on faking a flu bug for tonight. But, I'd miss my wine..., so I had to read it. I have to say that once I got into it, I was hooked. I liked the quick messages, the missed messages and the mixed messages. A great commentary on today's use of modern technology and how it affects relationship communication."

Frannie looks at me suddenly. "Is that what all that nonsense was on the page about dates, and to and from and subject lines? We were reading emails and texts?"

"Yes, Fran. That's why the book is called 'Save As Draft'. It's about the things you say and don't say when you are communicating through today's method of communication, mainly texts and emails(Jolly good idea for a book, by the way). Didn't you pick up on that?"

Frannie pats Mr. Tumnus on the head. "Well, I do now. It makes sense now that I know what is going on." She scratches Mr. Tumnus behind the ears and grows thoughtful. Finally she says, " I was rooting for her to end up with the first young man. And then when I heard the story of the second young man, I thought she should end up with him. She did a good job of making me torn between the two men."

"Are you kidding me, Frannie? The first guy was a complete and utter knob. I mean, later on in the book, he is a total toad. He is utterly self-absorbed--"

"But so is the main character." Rachel interrupts. "She is a very selfish person. I didn't like her at all. But the style the book was written in, once I got used to it, made for an interesting book. I don't know that I'd read a style like that again, but kudos to her for taking on a new way of writing. It was a quick, fun read, but not deep dish."

"Chick -lit never is. As I was saying earlier," I sigh, "we were sabotaged. This book demanded a unique sort of attention and it took our focus away from our true purpose."

"Which is?" Rachel asks, sipping her wine.

"Quality food." Frannie says, before I can speak. " Pass the brioche, Ella." 

Mr. Tumnus meows his agreement.

We decide that this book is a Take with You on the Tram and Read in Between Rides To and From Work...But Once is Enough

The Sweetness At the Bottom of the Pie by Alan Bradley

"I'm naming my scooter 'Gladys'. If it's good enough for Flavia's bicycle, it's good enough for me." Frannie comes in the door with this announcement and two pies. One is lemon and the other is some sort of fruity concoction.

"These look lovely, Frannie. I didn't know you were a baker." Rachel sips on her wine and watches as I place Frannie's pies next to my own rhubarb creme pie.

"Who is going to eat all this pie?" I ask.

"We are," announces Rachel. "Because it is going to take all three pies for me to talk about how much I adore this book. Alan Bradley was at my bedside all week."

Frannie coughs.

"In book form, Frannie! In book form. I couldn't put it down. Once I hit the half way mark I read until three in the morning. It was that addictive."

 "Frannie, tell all. What were your favourite bits from the story?" I ask as r. Tumnus eyes the cream topping on the rhubarb pie.

"Oh, all of it. My youth recaptured, of course. I was about the same age as Flavia in those days. Bradley nailed down the era so perfectly, so elegantly. I felt as though I were young once again, the wind flying through my own pigtails as I rode down the lane. For me, absolutely the grandest part was the setting--the depiction of the manor, Buckshaw, the quaintness of the village of Bishop Lacey and the time period. Bradley used a superb vocabulary to describe it all and I feel as though he wrote about my childhood."

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"You were a spy and detective who specialized in poisons and being cheeky with the police?" I ask Frannie.

Frannie smooths her skirt and adjusts her 'I heart Flavia' T-shirt. "Well, not exactly. But there was an incident once involving a mule, a vicar and an apple cart. I was directly involved and some good came out of it in the end."

Rachel and I stare at Frannie waiting for her to continue. Even Mr. Tumnus waits patiently for the full story.

"That's all. I'm not going into any details about how I rescued a man in dire need of saving and was rewarded with  bushel of apples. It's long ago and forgotten." Frannie nods her head emphatically. "Rachel, tell me your favourite bits?"

Rachel finishes her piece of pie and leans forward with a whisper. "My favourite scene is when the clues come together over the stamp. Absolutely crafty on Flavia's part. How she makes her discovery and deductions were very entertaining. Bravo."

"I simply loved the poisons and that chemistry lab of hers." I add, while selecting another piece of Frannie's fruity pie.

"The ending. Utter genius!" Rachel claps her hands. "The setting is perfect. Frannie is quite right on that point. That old house is perfect for all sorts of mystery. The characters are believable and diverse. The plot twists are quite unexpected. I am simply in love with this book."

I slice a piece of  lemon pie for Rachel. "I enjoyed the sister relationship. It is so deliciously written--the rivalry, the meanness, the arrogance. Oh, to have sisters who are so ruthless and mean!"

Rachel laughs, "The lipstick!"

We all burst out in a giggle over it.

"I want to watch the movie of it." Frannie says. "Youtube let me down this time. All it had was some sort of graphic show with a highlight of chapter one. Entertaining enough but I want to see the film! " She wiggles her eyebrows, "Perhaps Richard Armitage will be in it."

I ignore Frannie. If we get her talking about Richard Armitage we will never get to giving this book a verdict. I'm still recovering from last week's homage to Armitage.

"Listen, I have a thought." I place the last piece of fruity pie onto a plate and offer it to Frannie. "Let's read Flavia again. Only let's read the next book in a few weeks. I checked online and so far there are only four books in this series that are published. I say that we should read one a month and savour the books. I am tempted to do a 'thon, but it's simply too delicious to rush. One book a month, I say."

Rachel refills her wine glass and says, " I will toast to that. And to Flavia.!"

"To Flavia!" Frannie and I say in unison.

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We all agree, this book goes onto the hallowed shelf of "Will Definitely, At Some Point Soon-ish, Be Reading This Book Once Again". Preferably on a wet and bland day with a full box of digestives and a decent cup of tea.